Author Topic: new fan fiction : jedi peril  (Read 3132 times)

Offline beige-4

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new fan fiction : jedi peril
« on: March 08, 2011, 02:58:11 PM »
the story is of a 19 year old jedi knight called shaya koon ( great great great great grandmother of master plo ) she live's in the era of the old republic around 30 years before revan was born . just passing the jedi trials shaya is forced into the battlefield and expierences war at only 0.1 meters away from it ....


this is a teaser  ;D

Her dark-peach skin glistened with sweat as she ignited her azure blade again “ come on shaya fight ! “ ruptured the flakran , red and black tattoo’s spread across his chest onto his head and arms . “If you think you can beat me, think on “said shaya koon, she force-pushed the flakran into a plasti-steel wall “ergh! “ mumbled the sith , standing up straight the sith apprentice stood 8 foot high “no use intimidating me sith “ she said , the red bladed lightsaber struck the azure bladed sabre with orange sparks , pushing back with her lighsaber shaya took a step forward and placed herself in a defence position , the sith apprentice roared and slashed his lightsaber down at shaya , she replied with a difficult parry above her head , the sith took a step back however as shaya moved forward he quickly lunged scarring shaya’s arm , shaya grunted and twisted her body to counter-attack , her blade dug into the side of the assailants’ stomach , he screamed and his lightsaber fell to the ground , his eye’s turning white , he slumped to the floor lifeless . Shaya looked around her, a black room lighted by the fires and lightsabers beyond the wall, she looked at the rodian and bothan cowering in the corner “it’s alright he’s dead “said the jedi “T... th... Thank you “said the rodian in a highly accented voice, shaya threw a blaster towards the bothan “shoot any sith which comes through that door, understand?” The rodian nodded. Shaya sprinted ou the building to help her jedi comrades …

Offline CloneSniper78

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #1 on: March 10, 2011, 08:22:42 PM »
Very good Beige4. Well I'm hooked. Can't wait to see what happens next. You gonna make a custom of the Jedi?

Offline beige-4

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2011, 10:10:51 AM »
YEP ordered a plo koon for heads and legs and hands  ;D

and i will be doing a lot of background characters , hoping to make a photonovel out of this !
« Last Edit: March 11, 2011, 02:25:28 PM by beige-4 »

Offline beige-4

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #3 on: March 11, 2011, 02:24:26 PM »
CHAPTER 2 is OUT !!

enjoy !

The street was filled with wondrous colours clashing against each other however these were no fireworks these were lightsabers, capable of killing people. Refugees ran out of the danger zone and shaya ignited her lightsaber and force-jumped into the battle landing in between two hooded-sith and instantly slashing her blade across each of their torsos, sprinting towards the next target she side-stepped and force pushed a sith into another, a jedi was force-pushed across the battlefield by what looked to be the leader of this raid on tercox 5, he marched towards shaya, slashing and sweeping any jedi in his way , roaring a almighty battle cry he lunged at shaya only to be blocked by her master’s blue blade , roth’os set , his blue skin wasn’t marked by anything and the reflections of his surrounding’s caught his skin and bounced off in a gleaming array of colours , he was a chiss master on the council but he was seconded to the anti-sith council , after seeing shaya’s amazing lightsaber skill’s he chose her immediately , practicing with her everyday . Thos, as every one called him tried his very hardest to make shaya the best , passing jedi trials with flying colours she was immediately sent out to the battle zone and now here she stood battling the sith commander with he master .

Offline beige-4

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #4 on: March 12, 2011, 05:07:30 AM »
CHAPTER 3

The sith commander wore a black suit with red armour, his chin was covered by a breathing respirator and on his head was a helmet, one of his eyes was full of pus and blood and the other was silver, his teeth were sharp and rotten, and his red and black tattooed head glimmered in the dark. “shaya get back to the ship I’ll handle him“ shouted Thos over the noise “No! I will help you defeat him” said shaya as she parried the commander’s attack, Thos’s eyes sunk as he saw shaya being cut near the knee by the sith, sudden anger filled Thos but he subdued it to the back of his mind, the commander lunged at Thos but he parried and force-pushed him away, Thos situated himself in a defence position in front of shaya, protecting her from danger, shaya looked up and saw the two fighting, no! Thos was pushed on the ground and the sith’s lightsaber was pointed at his throat, shaya painfully stood up and saw red in her eye’s as she limped towards the sith, he saw her and withdrew his lightsaber and pointed it at her, she quickly ran at him and slashed down with all her might, the sith didn’t expect a jedi knight to cut his arm off! A blue lightsaber thrust through the sith’s chest and the sith gasped. “Good work shaya” congratulated the chiss jedi, as he walked her to the ship.

Offline Mungo Baobab

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #5 on: March 17, 2011, 02:13:03 PM »
Nice work Beige. I like how you have used "Thos." Can't wait to read more.

Offline beige-4

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #6 on: March 18, 2011, 10:08:33 AM »
Nice work Beige. I like how you have used "Thos." Can't wait to read more.
thanks mungo, my face lights up when i see comments ! ;D

Offline beige-4

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #7 on: March 18, 2011, 10:19:10 AM »
chapter 4 is being deleted as i need to redo it.
« Last Edit: May 11, 2011, 09:54:20 AM by beige-4 »

Offline beige-4

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #8 on: March 20, 2011, 02:09:26 PM »
CHAPTER 5

Shaya walked out of the debriefing room and started to sprint along the corridors to her room. Rast bondar was leaning against his door, his robes were wet and water dripped from his peachy head, “ahh I can’t even get in my room” he moaned, the instant he saw shaya, “ your not getting free passage in my room you stupid flirt!” said the kel dorian female “ah, come on shaya “ pleaded rast “NO! rast I’m not going to let you in my bunk” shouted shaya “you know you love me “ said rast seductively “ why you … half-witted … scruffy looking .. NERF HERDER!” said shaya loudly “anything wrong” shayas door opened and her brother loomed out “no nothing” screeched rast, he opened his door and jumped in. “god, I hate men!” muttered shaya. “You need rest, you fought a valiant battle, you should be proud” said lunar koon. Shaya looked up at her brother and felt happy “Thank you” she said. Lunar moved out her way and then started to climb on to his bunk. “Good sleep shaya”

Offline beige-4

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #9 on: March 26, 2011, 06:54:05 AM »
CHAPTER 6 assassins

“Send your best men! She killed my brother!” ordered the tall sith lord “yes master we will send two of our best assassins after her! She will be dead by sunrise my lord!”



Two sith assassins jumped from bush to bush to the hangar, one holding two vibro swords the other held a blaster rifle and jetpack well, both of them had jetpacks. They reached their RV point and started slicing the ventilation hatch. They succeeded and jetted down the rectangular hole. Hovering they started to cut a hole, in the side of the shaft. “Done” they swooped towards the underground temple. They reached their second RV point and one of the assassins set a charge and the other broke a plasti-glass window to get into the corridor, he squatted outside a door and the 1st assassin thrust downwards with his lightsaber cutting a hole and throwing a flashbang in the hole. At that moment the 2nd assassin kicked the door down and ran in only to be decapitated by a huge kel-dorian the first assassin jumped down and grappled on the back of the kel-dorian trying to snap his neck. Shaya woke up and reached for her lightsaber. It wasn’t there! Seeing the danger to her brother Shaya jumped onto the sith and snapped his neck… a alarm went off warning of a sith invasion!

Offline beige-4

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #10 on: April 25, 2011, 11:42:19 AM »
Two sith cruisers leapt out of hyperspace into the chedis / tekaro system, a binary star system, most unusual, a pulsar star “tekaro “and a red dwarf “chedis “with 3 planets orbiting both.

chedia the closest, normally hit by the pulsar rays every few months, it is a dusty planet, no water just the barren deserts, the most distinctive part is the valley of kings and many pyramid’s devoted to religion of the stars.

Second in line is purchedia, a huge planet with purple seas and small islands filled with exotic plants and stone pyramids, also on this planet are the native chedians these beige skinned humanoids are known for their “tentacle” mouths .Like a sarlacc, but smaller. There is also a small jedi temple as the chedians have a natural high midi chlorian count. It is located on a island in the south.

The third planet is valern a Trader’s planet, the systems touch to reality you may say. It has one island which inhabits many species.

The Fourth planet is tekarov; the residents of tekarov originate from purchedia but were hunted and exiled. The inhabitants are humanoid but with crimson skin as they evolved from a purchedian sea ape. Tekarov is a water planet with a “dog” island on the equator.

The fifth. Tekarov II is a land planet with a small amount of “lakes” or oversized ponds. A jedi temple is located here and it is renowned for its own council. It also gets many chedian’s as the jedi temple on purchedia is filled. 

The sixth planet is chedioso a hoth-like planet occupied by many mountains and tunnels made by chedians which have evolved into a smaller type and they have mouths not tentacles. There are also underground pyramids which are upside down facing the core. With tunnels going all the way down to the core, for heat.

The sith lord darth raven, stopped reading and looked at tekaro the pulsar star. “If we can only move the beam of the star towards the jedi temple”

Offline beige-4

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Re: new fan fiction : jedi peril
« Reply #11 on: May 14, 2011, 07:18:08 AM »
CHAPTER 8 part 1


“Word has come from the temple on purchedia, good news in fact, that a single knight destroyed a whole platoon of sith warriors” beamed master kala trigan, a series of “yes” and “take that’s “, were heard from the audience of jedi knights.


The grey transport ship drifted towards the hangar. “It won’t make it!” a togrutan knight exclaimed. A few minutes later, all the jedi on-sight were watching horror as two sleek black ship’s entered the atmosphere, the flag ship started firing cannons on the transport. Crippling under the plasma, the transport ripped open and blew up. The remaining parts of the ship dazzled towards he ground. Focusing now on the two ships the jedi all unhooked their lightsabers.


Five shuttles raced towards the temple. Landing only half a mile away, Master tra kosk lifted a thermo-scope to his eyes, each of the shuttles loading ramps were on the ground already, at least half a platoon marched from each shuttle, his scope picked out one sith warrior looking directly at tra kosk, a red daze began to enlarge on the screen and with that Tra kosk’s head rolled to a group of knights.

Alexei volski’s head shot up as he heard many lightsabers igniting. He checked his forearm and saw his lightsaber gauntlet; he leaped up and crouched on a perch while his two brothers, demetri and makar woke, “Brothers we are injured but we must do what we can to ensure the safety of the jedi on the hills” demetri and makar nodded.
Alexei lunged at the nearest sith’s neck and crushed it with his hand, with his other arm he swung his gauntlet at another sith, demetri ignited his yellow lightsaber and started to cut down sith while makar jumped into the middle of the sith platoon and started lunging and slicing sith with his green double bladed lightsaber.


Shaya koon, Lunar koon, Thos, Travis vince, Rast bondar and Kala trigan, formed a circle and started to parry sith attacks, Thos single-handily killed eight sith, while Shaya sliced a sith in half, then jumped and swung her lightsaber through three sith. Lunar marched towards a sith assassin 10 meters away slashing every sith who dared to get in his way, finally in front of the assassin he used most of his strength to batter his saber onto the sith, counter-attacking the assassin swiftly side stepped and struck his lightsaber into the kel-dor’s gut, Lunar screamed like a bull and with the assassins lightsaber still in the side of his stomach he force pulled the sith near his face and started punching the sith in the face. Dropping the bloody sith on the ground Lunar gripped the lightsaber and ripped it out of his stomach and threw it into the nearest sith’s chest.